SIB will be posting musings, advice, and her thoughts here on a weekly basis. Be warned, this IS a sex column and although there won’t be any steamy visuals (it’s not porn, ya know?) the text WILL be NSFW.

Welcome back my Baltimore readers! I am so thrilled to continue to hear from so many of you and I am glad you enjoy this column. More importantly, I want you to think of this as your column. I don’t need to wax poetic each week and indulge my own stories – that is what my blog is for. Keep asking your questions and sending your topic suggestions and I will fully satisfy you here (or at least try my hardest – I aim to please). Just remember to leave comments here on this page as well – don’t be shy!

Think back to your first crush when you were a teenager. If you met this person on the street today do you think you would hit off as well? Would you date them again? Would you have sex just to see how it would be with them?

Ah – to be young again! I remember Kenny and my first real kiss very well. It was the very beginning of ninth grade. I went to Catholic school up until eighth grade so I was a late bloomer I guess you can say. He had just moved into the neighborhood and lived two houses down, but I was attending the public school and he was going to an all-boys Catholic school. We would talk for hours that August before school began. Finally, the first day of school, we met in the woods between our houses and talked before his bus came. He leaned in and kissed me and I felt butterflies for the first time. We never really dated because we both met different people at our respective schools, but I always wondered about him. I would totally have sex with him just to see what it would be like, but I would imagine our sex would be VERY different today than if we had done it way back when. Thanks for prompting my thoughts for my next self-play session!

When did you first realize that you were into kink? What was the first kinky thing you craved?

I have always been a very sexual person, even in all of my very vanilla relationships. I love to have sex, kiss, play, tease on a daily basis. If my boyfriend ever initiated something, it would be VERY rare for me to say no. As a matter of fact, I was probably often known to initiate play on many occasions. The very first time I realized I liked being more kinky than others was with a guy I dated when I first moved to Maryland. He would sometimes just finger me and watch me as I came. I can be quite shy, so I would feel self-conscious, but I loved how he looked at me when I would climax. I craved him watching me climax and the joy he got from it. After that, it was a few years until I met my former neighbor and he liked to watch me masturbate for him. He has told me that he didn’t really think of himself as a Dominant before then, but that our dynamic made him feel more and more like he wanted to be in control of me. That really turned me on and I think it started me thinking that I liked not being in the driver’s seat sexually, but at the time I wasn’t really sure what that meant. It wasn’t until I met Daddy J and probably our third night together
that I truly started to understand my inner most sexuality and identifying as a submissive. That night, the truly first kinky thing I actually craved was him spanking me and I have loved it ever since.

I love giving oral sex to my girlfriend. It gets me so hot after I make her orgasm that way that I want to have sex with her that much more. But after I do go down on her, she makes me go brush my teeth before I can kiss her, which kills the mood for me if you know what I mean. How do I get her to understand?

This is an interesting issue and I can certainly see why it would take you out of your game. In football, I would imagine it is a lot like the other team calling the timeout, just as the kicker is about to start for a field goal. As always, in any relationship sexual or not, I think communication is critical and talking about the situation is the first step. Find out why she has an issue with kissing you at that time. Help her to understand what it is you enjoy so much about pleasing her orally. Tell her how it excites you and how close it makes you feel to her. Reassure her that you are both sharing an intimate moment and to try to not be so mentally caught up with what is happening, but rather how you are both feeling. Only until you understand what is holding her back can you begin to figure out how to solve it. By opening up to her about how important it is to you, she may be able to get over her hang-up. I can say that I never thought about tasting myself until a guy I was with put his fingers in my mouth after he had just played with me. I wasn’t expecting it and I would have never done it on my own, but once the barrier was broken, my hesitation went away and now it is actually something I enjoy.

I’ll be back next week, but feel free to ask away – I love answering questions and hearing your suggestions: [email protected] and follow me on Tumblr and Twitter.

Last Week:  What About The Back Door?

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