Fake tan? Check. Acrylic nails? Check. Hair extensions? Check. Paul's Boutique Limited Edition Barbie padlock bag? Check! I know what you're thinking...the rider for Gossip Girl or The Hills?  Or is it the Pekingese pen pal of Paris Hilton?

Ideally, it would be 1965 and I would be doing a little more than stalking Paolo. I would be a hippy chick with love (not war) in my heart and there would be no barriers between a fan like me and her idol.

Unfortunately for me, and dare I say Paolo, it's not the swinging sixties and there is more than just burly security separating musicians and the girls who mouth along.