SIB will be posting musings, advice, and her thoughts here on a weekly basis. Be warned, this IS a sex column and although there won’t be any steamy visuals (it’s not porn, ya know?) the text WILL be NSFW.

This week – it is question and comments time once again. Feel left out? Well, silly, then take the plunge write to me and ask me anything your little heart desires.

Was hoping to meet you at the Mobbies Awards, but saw you weren’t there. Good that you followed me on Twitter! Been in various D/S relationships for 25 years– 19 with the same person– as the Dom, I enjoy reading your experiences and wish you well in your search. I’m currently not in a relationship; taking a break before getting back into it. – Anonymous

Amazing! I still am in awe and shock that I won! More importantly, I am so flattered by the category in which I won. Knowing that my readers are happy with the amount that I engage with them is the best compliment I could receive. I sometimes think I value them more than even they know, so them supporting me is more like icing on my cake 😉

I REALLY wanted to attend the awards, but I had to stay home. Unfortunately, due to needing to pay my mortgage and bills, I have to keep my day job, which would definitely be in jeopardy due to the content of which write. So, my anonymity is critical to my continuation in the blogging world. Afterwards, I heard lots of “rumors” and “conspiracies” as to who I really am and why I wasn’t there, but it really is quite simple as I have said. But, I suppose people will always have their own theories. 😉

I don’t know many people in D/s relations, as I have been only recently learning about most of it myself. I am so glad you enjoy reading my writing. Many people wonder why I don’t post more often. But mainly, lately, it is because I have been so “inactive” dating and sexually. I don’t want to bore people with just my thoughts and desires. I think most of my readers want to hear about the down and dirty, sexual details, but I fear letting them down because there aren’t any details lately. 🙂

I hope you continue to follow me and I appreciate all your support!

Are you as intriguing as your tweets suggest? – Anonymous

I guess that is a matter of opinion. I like to think I am interesting and keep people on their toes. I love a challenge and I hate being idle for too long. Above all else, however, I am just a smart, normal, yet geeky, pretty girl in my 30s. I have hobbies just like most people, I enjoy my friends, writing, reading, listening to music, etc.  It is just that I have learned that I am naturally submissive sexually and I like my sex a little on the kinky side. I don’t think that is anything outrageous, but, as I have written about before, American society in general tends to be pretty up-tight and closed-minded about sex. By continuing to write, here and on my blog and possibly someday in a book, about how natural sex can be, I truly hope that this will change. I want to open the conversation and encourage more people to have the sexual confidence that I have learned to have. I think with the help of all of you, we are moving in the right direction.

My roommate was not supposed to come home one night because she was staying with her boyfriend. So, my boyfriend came over and brought a porno for us to enjoy. The movie got us both so excited that we started fooling around right in the living room. We were so wrapped up in our amazing session that I didn’t hear my roommate come home and she walked right in on us. She apologized and ran to her room. Of course, we stopped and went to my room as well to finish. Since then, she has been acting offish to me and I don’t know what to do. I think she is mad at me, but when I ask her about it she denies it. What should I do? –Roommate in Trouble, Pasadena, MD

I think this depends on how close you two are. If you two were best girlfriends before the incident, and you have tried to talk to her, maybe just continue to give her a little space. She may just need some space to process how she really feels about everything. If she is a good friend, she will “forgive” you or at least eventually come to you to open up about what is bothering her. It may not even be what happened that is causing the problem. It could be something else altogether. But I think as always it is important to talk about things so that we don’t make assumptions and get hurt for reasons that don’t really exist.

If you two aren’t particularly friends, I would suggest a slightly more direct approach. The apartment/house is a space for both of you to live and feel comfortable. She has a right to want to know that she is respected in her own home, and having sex in a common area, although very erotic and sexy, does show a small lack of respect for boundaries, especially if you two weren’t close to begin with. Sit her down and sincerely apologize for not acknowledging her space. You weren’t wrong to have sex, but maybe it wasn’t the best idea to do it where you did. By coming to the table with humility, that usually allows for the other person to feel less threatened and more likely to open up and come to a compromise. Suggest that you both set-up better ground rules for common areas and make a commitment to respect each other. I think it will go a long way to a peaceful habitat.

Hopefully you are all ready to enjoy the holiday with your friends and family. Take some time to reflect on all that you have been blessed with in your life. That is exactly what I do in my latest blog post.

See you next time, Baltimore!

I love answering questions and hearing your suggestions: and follow me on my blog, Tumblr, and Twitter.

Last Time:

Sex In Bmore: Forget The Numbers